I believe it was in 2006, when I was battling a debilitating flare-up with what was then an unknown illness, I cried out to God, telling Him I didn't want to go on living any longer. I didn't want to die...I simply didn't know how to live like I was. I had been listening to a CD by a young woman named Amy Nobles and the above mentioned song (If You Say Go) began playing. One particular phrase caught my ear. "If you call us to the fire, you will not withdraw your hand. We'll gaze into the flames and look for you."
At that moment, God spoke so clearly to me saying, "Debbie, I am in the fire with you. I want you to look for me and see what I am doing in the flames." Now, it wasn't audible but it was very clear and I knew it was God. I immediately thought of the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. Since I cannot read (due to poor vision), I got on my computer and pulled up Daniel Chapters 1-3 and listened to their story over and over again. God opened up the pages of that story in ways I had never known before, speaking truth into my heart about what He does in and through the trials of my life...showing me what He is doing while He and I are in the flames of my own personal furnaces.
The next few weeks were some of the most life changing weeks of my life. My view of trials was turned upside down and inside out. Trials and suffering were no longer something I dreaded but rather looked forward to, with excitement and anticipation because I knew they meant God was up to something huge and it would give me a chance to participate in Him receiving glory. Now, don't get me wrong, I did not go around looking for furnaces in which to jump. I simply no longer grumbled and complained when they came my way.
I also found myself wanting to share these new truths with everybody with whom I came into contact, especially those facing struggles in their lives. Well, that was just about everybody. I became so passionate about teaching others these truths. God began burdening my heart to write a book...not just any book but a Bible study. I resisted for months but finally obeyed and wrote the study Joy in the Furnace.
As I was writing the book, I asked my friend, Sandy Francis, if her Bible study group in Kinshasa, DRC, would like to be my pilot group and test the study for me. They readily agreed and did the study right on the heels of my writing...even before it was edited. Since then, the book has been edited (twice) and published. (And now I will get to speak to these same women (and others), about Joy in the Furnace, while I am in Kinshasa.)
This morning's thoughts from God bring everything to a new level...a place I never could have imagined on that very dark day I was listening to this song, back in 2006. "If you say go, we will go" are the words from the song with which I was awakened this morning. And then there were those words, "If you say step out on the water, though they say it can't be done. We'll fix our eyes on you and we will come."
When Mike and I felt God calling us to go to the DRC, just a few short weeks ago, we so readily said, "Yes." In fact, one reason I was sure it was of God was because of the ease with which Mike said "yes". You have to understand that Mike took his very first plane trip this Christmas to see my girls. For him to agree (after praying together) to fly 10,000 miles to Africa, without any hesitation, confirmed that God was calling us. Ha! In all seriousness, we both knew God was asking us to go...asking us to walk out on the water. We had very little time in which to meet/talk with appropriate people, obtain a birth certificate, passports and visas, complete paperwork, receive several shots, raise an enormous amount of money, and so much more. In human terms, the tasks seemed insurmountable for the time frame. Yet we knew that when God calls you to do something, He will not fail. All He asks is that we keep our eyes on Him.
It has been easy to take our eyes off of Jesus and worry as to whether things will get done (e.g. passports arriving on time). However, God continues to remind us that He is the one who called us. It is His job to take care of those details. We are to do our part, which does include completing forms, mailing items, being responsible with the funds He provides, etc. The main responsibility we have, however, is to keep our eyes on Him, always, always, always.
And so, in closing I quote the words from the song, "We fix our eyes on you and we will come."
Debbie
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